INDENT the ones that apply to you (the non bold does not apply to me):

01. I've always been a loner.
02. Pretty boys make me squeal.
03. I love long hair on guys.
04. I'm second in my class.
05. I have a bad habit of using faces. Like ^^ or XD.
06. I have multiple eating disorders.
07. I hate when people pretend to be bi in order to be trendy.
08. I hate the phrase "metrosexual."
09. My goal in life is to travel.
10. Kyo.
11. I detest children. (haha not really, but they bother me sometimes.. like on Halloween)
12. I'm still a child at heart.
13. I own you at ping pong. (but not really…)
14. I was in love with Johnny Depp before anyone even considered making The Pirates of the Caribbean.
15. Pink is one of the best colors.
16. I am pro-choice.
17. No offense, but I'm sick of seeing Jack Sparrow icons.
18. People say I have no body fat, but oh, are they wrong.
19. I prefer being single.
20. I'm a jealous person.
21. I hate criticism, even though it helps me more than I think it does.
22. Even so, I don't know how to respond to compliments.
23. I love writing, even though I think my writing is terrible.
24. I wear a ton of makeup.
25. I look at everyone's AIM info everytime they're online, even though it rarely changes.
26. I also read everyone's away messages.
27. I have been known to play video games for unhealthy amounts of time.
28. I am passionate about all my interests.
29. I hate people who hold strong opinions on things they know nothing about.
30. I hate when people look over my shoulder.
31. I don't like what I look like.
32. I'm a grammar-nazi, and I have the better grammar than anyone else I know.
33. I procrastinate. A LOT.
34. I hate DragonBall Z.
35. I sleep too little.
36. Je parle le francais.
37. I am obsessed with making journal icons.
38. I love Shinya. XD
39. I think Greatest Journal is the best journal site out there. ^_^
40. In fact... I really dislike LJ.
41. I cry over everything.
42. A lot of people in my school dislike me.
43. I complain about everything.
44. I have a very high-pitched voice.
45. I squeek a lot, involuntarily, and often get made fun of for it.
46. I'm indecisive.
47. It makes me mad when things I like become trendy.
48. I could live off of sushi.
49. I have a lot more money than do most of my friends.
50. I like guys with dark hair.
51. I'm not that attracted to many guys that aren't asian
52. It is a proven fact that I prefer talking to people online if they use complete sentences and correct grammar/punctuation.
53. It's easier than most would expect to make me cry.

54. I'm tired of worrying about shit.
55. I correct others' spelling/grammar quite often.
56. I don't play any team sports for my school.
57. I want to go to Japan and see dir en grey live.
58. I hate sounding obsessed with a musical artist.
59. I like when my friends write me letters, it makes me feel special.
60. I never want to get married.
61. I like PIRATES!
62. I hate any alcoholic drinks.
63. I prefer urban life over rural life.
64. I'm obsessed with fashion.
65. I like to make my own clothes.
66. My grades are very important to me.
67. Contrary to popular belief, I don't hate everyone.
68. But I hate a lot of people.
69. Androgyny is sexy.
70. I hate school. (but not APA, of course)
71. I rant too much.
72. I hog the covers.
73. I'm online a lot. I have no life.
74. I am a good judge of character.
75. I find it difficult to be good friends with stupid people.
76. I am obsessed with anime.
77. I like to read a lot, but never have time.
78. I can be really mean when I want to.
79. But I can also be more thoughtful than a lot of people.
80. I always try to help others as much as I can.
81. I'm very irritable.
82. I've never cheated in school, and hate people who do. (yay for hypocrites…)
83. I've never cheated in a relationship, and if anyone ever cheated on me, he/she would never get a second chance.
84. My parents are divorced.
85. Narrow minded people make me want to get a gun.
86. I have a stepmother.
87. I <3 ice cream but never eat it.
88. I haven't watched The Sound of Music yet.
89. I hate people that cut to be trendy, and I think it's just crazy that there are people who only do that to be cool.
90. I hate having the feeling that I'm not going to go anywhere in life.
91. I don't like crowds.
92. I dislike people that think the mall is the root of all evil. It's just a place. Get over it.
93. I'm not as much of a TV addict as I used to be. In fact, I rarely watch TV anymore.
94. Most of my friends hate Bush, but I have no opinion on him. Politics bore me.
95. I am better at keeping secrets than are most of my friends.
96. I'm a lazy ass. I really am.
97. I love my parents, but never know how to show them.
98. I am not yet in college, and have no idea where I'd like to go.
99. When I DO allow myself to get close to people, which is rare, I get very attatched.
100. I wish there were more numbers on here. I'm on a roll.

 i saw him.

the love of my life. highlight of my past III and a half months. it took some illegal antics with my accomplice & bestfriend katie<3; but all ended perfect. And eventho we only saw eachother for a few heavenly minutes it was worth everything it took. He even wrote me back secretly with the most beautiful words I have ever read. First time truly smiling in so long...you know you're in love when it feels so good just knowing that person is in the world.

As for the other love of my life, acting, I only got 2 call backs for the 10 Minute Fest, but rejection is life. I really feel for Chessie's play. (which nathan just happens to be directing) I kinda felt chills during our coldreading from the script...The only difference from my real past experiences from the lead, is that they wanted me for her bestfriend...which turned the whole thing around for me. I was always the one getting abused, and all my friends had to see me fall apart. but the part i hope i get is actually the bestfriend, which will be chill considering I've been through all the horror that comes with an abusive relationship. Nathan is such a joy to work with also so that would be nice. But still, even if I don't get the part I suppose I still have Nanny to work on in BWTBW. I'm pretty excited about that experience.

As for everything else...I am waiting for him* if it fuckin kills me. Jamie Santiago will forever hold my heart in his grasp. And love to all of you that have spent time talking to me or listening to my emo drama, you dont know how much that really does mean to me.

it is thankgiving and i am in santa cruz. well i can honestly say i am thankful to have fallen in love this year, and to know that somehow, somewhere, sometime we will be together again. its just a matter of time i suppose. time and hurt. im a lover of loving love but then again i really am in love with HIM. i was just listening to my other HIM(the band). best band ever. god i am so fucked up now. i am so paralyzed by your love. yes i dont even care how fucking pathetic i sound. here is some rad lyrics: (HIM)

"Im waiting for your call and Im ready to take your 666 in my heart. Im longing for your touch and I welcome your 666 in my heart. How long we have to wait....." "Im in love with you and its crushing my heart. All i want is you To take me into your arms. When love and death embrace..."

"We are so young, Our lives have just begun, But already we are considering Escape from this world. And we've waited so long for this moment to come, Was so anxious to be together...together in death. Would you die tonight for love? This world is a cruel place And we're here only to lose. So before Life Tears Us Apart, let death Bless me with YOU."

i miss him.....please let this pain go away.